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Un nuevo año comienza
aunque, en sí mismo, no es un acontecimiento trascendental, sí que nos suele
servir para recapacitar y proyectar.
Sin embargo, en no muchas
fechas, muchos de esos propósitos acaban aparcados y olvidados. En realidad,
todo esto tiene mucho que ver con cualquier tipo de determinación que se
proponga una persona, en cualquier circunstancia, y la incapacidad para
acometerla.
Pero hay formas / métodos
/ trucos / sugerencias que pueden ser útiles y ayudar a quien se proponga
realmente conseguir aquello que se propuso. Hoy me hago eco de las que una
monitora de fitness americana (muy inspiradora, ella…) comparte en su blog
(blog que os recomiendo, no tiene desperdicio: www.carolinejordanfitness.com)
Caroline, muy
resumidamente, viene a decirnos lo siguiente:
En primer lugar habla de
los obstáculos que inicialmente hacen que esos buenos propósitos se queden,
precisamente, en eso, solo en propósito:
·
Vaguedad en
la definición de lo que se pretende.
·
Falta de un
compromiso serio.
·
Poner excusas
para no acometer lo propuesto.
·
Falta de
voluntad de pasar por las fases difíciles.
·
No establecer
un sistema de medición y recordatorio.
·
Esperar un
resultado perfecto y, al no conseguirlo, caer en la culpa, vergüenza y
resentimiento.
·
Intentarlo en
solitario.
·
Contarte a ti
mismo historias que limitan tu confianza.
·
No tener un
plan B.
·
Convertir los
tropiezos en abandonos.
Para superar lo anterior,
¿qué propone Caroline?
·
Hacer que el
objetivo sea “no negociable”.
·
Hacer que el
objetivo sea traducible en acciones concretas.
·
Visualizar el
objetivo gráficamente; por ejemplo, creando un póster y colocándolo en un lugar
visible, a modo de recordatorio.
·
Preparar las
respuestas ante las previsibles excusas.
·
Rodearse de
personas que apoyen en la consecución del objetivo.
·
Poner una
fecha para cumplir el objetivo.
·
Incluir las
tareas relacionadas con el objetivo dentro de las rutinas habituales.
·
Trabajar en
ello diariamente.
·
Medir el
desempeño, no sólo al final, sino durante el proceso.
·
Verlo todo en
perspectiva.
·
Toma
conciencia de lo que haces.
·
Encuentra un
referente, alguien que ya hace o ha conseguido lo que tú quieres conseguir, y
síguelo.
·
Sé tú la
referencia e inspiración de otros.
·
No seas duro
contigo mismo.
·
“La salida
está en el cambio. El cambio es madurar. Madurar es la creación de uno mismo”.
Y, a continuación, la
versión original en inglés con todo el desarrollo de cada punto.
Espero que os inspire.
Raúl.
It’s January
and New Years Resolution Season is in full force. Large bucket lists, extreme
makeovers, ambitious personal or professional goals. Setting resolutions
can be fun and inspiring, and I’m ALL for creating powerful visions that
promote positive actions. Many
people are with me, about 45 percent of Americans set goals starting in
January. But
for all the good intentions, only a tiny fraction of us keep our
commitments. According to the Journal
of Clinical Psychology study 54 percent give up on their resolutions
within six months — and only 8 percent ultimately succeed by the end of the
year. Setting a goal you don’t plan on keeping actually backfires on your
long-term health, happiness, and success. Want to set a goal you can keep and
feel good about it in the process? Read on for my suggestions on succeeding
with New Years Resolutions and honoring a promise to yourself.
Caroline’s
Guide On Keeping a New Years Resolution
First lets take a look at Common Resolution Pitfalls. Knowing these obstacles
will help you create strategies to overcome them and accomplish your
goals.
1.
Being
vague about what you want
2.
Not
making a serious commitment
3.
Procrastinating
and excuse-making
4.
Unwillingness
to go through the awkward phase
5.
Not
setting up a tracking and reminder system
6.
Expecting
perfection, falling into guilt, shame, regret
7.
Trying
to go at it alone
8.
Telling
yourself self-limiting belief stories
9.
Not
having backup plans
10.
Turning
slip-ups to give-ups
Overcome
the above pitfalls with these Resolution Success Strategies
Make
your goal Non-negotiable. Make a promise yourself that you are absolutely
without question going to do. When you do it, where you do it, how you do it
can, and will most likely change according to circumstances (aka life). But that you will do it is not open for
consideration. Call it a vow, a promise, a pledge, a commitment.
Whatever you name it, making it choiceless is a tool for overcoming backsliding
after your initial enthusiasm fades. You don’t negotiate with yourself about
brushing your teeth. You just do it. I bet you honor your commitments to other
people too. Treat yourself equally as well . Make your resolution a
nonnegotionable commitment in your life.
Make it
Actionable. Is your goal concrete enough? Many of us fail because we havent turned
our goals into somthing to actually do. Yesterday a client told me she was
going to focus more on herself and less on her job. “How are you going to put
that into action?” I asked. There was silence on her end. Recently here are
some resolutions I have heard, “to have more energy” “to learn to relax” “to
make better decisions” “to say no more” “to have more balance”. There is
nothing wrong with these desires. But they must be translated into actions. Actions
tell you how you are going to do something. “I’m going to go to bed an hour
earlier and exercise 30 minutes daily to have more energy.” “I’m going to spend
three hours a week relaxing and reading on the couch.” To succeed, you must
know what specific, realistic actions you are going to take.
Make a
powerful visual reminder. One thing I find extremely effective in setting
goals that have lasting power is creating a vision board. Creating
vision boards is considered by many to be a vital step on the road to success.
Since positive, focused thinking is the key to achieving
goals, pinpointing what those goals are and having something tangible to
symbolize them is an essential part of the process. Vision boards remind us
what we should and should not be doing in order to achieve our goals. The
images and phrases that make the board should represent the highest priorities
in your life. It reinforces what you truly want and helps keep you on track in
living it. It’s easy to do and a powerful tool, click
here to read more on how to make your own goal vision board.
Come up
with Solutions for your usual Excuses. What is your usual litany of excuses and
rationalizations? One way to think about this is to ask yourself what has
gotten in your way in the past when you have tried to keep this resolution or
any other. Forgetting? No time? Losing interest? Not knowing where to begin?
And what are the rationalizations you give yourself when you gave up in the
past? It doesn’t matter? It’s not that bad? It’s too hard? Instead of just
hoping it will be different this time, write down your typical excuses and
rationalizations and create strategies in advance for dealing with them. That
way you wont get stopped in your tracks and lose forward momentum when they
arise. And yes, they will! Because of the way our brains are wired we have a
strong tendency to repeat behavior over and over. So think ahead, come
prepared, and beat your brain at the excuses game.
Build a
strong support network. They say you are most like the 5 people you surround
yourself with. Its true, your community, co-workers, friends, and family have
the biggest impact on whether or not you succeed at your goals. Build a
strong support network by 1. Communicating your goals to your network and
asking them to support you and 2. Choosing to surround yourself with people who
have a positive impact on your lifestyle and goals. STAY CONNECTED to these people, its important to have a team
cheering for you! No one can succeed solo 
Set a
deadline. Business
coach, Mike R. Jay claims that 60 percent of the population is “pressure
promoted”, as it’s called on the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator. It’s a
preference, usually labeled as procrastination, for taking in information for
as long as possible before being forced into action by some external deadline.
The other 40 % are “early starters”, who prefer to get the ball rolling and avoid
pressure. If you fall into the pressure-promted majority, find a deadline that
will help you get into motion – a reunion, a vacation, a wedding, a
performance. One would-be dieter and exerciser finally got off the starting
line when she booked her trip to Hawaii, which required her to wear a swimsuit
with her boyfriend. Another man finished his Ph.D thesis, which had been
lagging for years, when he got a job that required it’s completion. To work
most effectively, the deadline must be real and come from the outside. Pressure
prompters tend to blow off self created deadlines.
Schedule
it in. Fail to plan and you plan to fail. People who succeed make time for their
goals within their schedule. Put it into your day planner and treat
your commitment like an important appointment with a client. Otherwise it’s too
easy to schedule all your time away with other things. Want to write every day?
Block it in your calendar. Want to start looking for a date on Match.com ?
Schedule it. Make a specific, time-bound appointment with yourself and you’ll
be much more likely to follow through.
Do it
Daily. Someone
asked the Dali Lama to describe in one word the secret to living a healthy
life. His answer? “Routines”. Bad habits imprision us; good ones bring us
closer to our hearts desire. The more you make what you want a part of your
everyday life, the more it will become so routine that soon you won’t even have
to think about it. If you want to have more work/life balance, for instance,
find a way to do a little something each day: leave the office half and hour
earlier, take a walk with the family after dnner, read a novel before bed.
Track
Your Behavior. Research shows that when you monitor your behavior and
track your outcomes, you’re more likely to be motivated and perform. That’s
because tracking is a key to self-regulation, the capacity to do what it is you
say you want to. Monitoring can take the form of a food journal, NIKE fuel
band, smart phone application, anything that helps you track your activity and
progress overtime. Check
out a list of some of my favorite smart phone apps here for health, fitness,
and wellness. One
of my favorite life guru’s Tim Ferris, advises people to track their food
intake using the “Flash Diet” in which they simply take photos of everything
they eat/drink. This tracking is highly effective as it builds immediate
awareness regarding caloric intake. You can track your progress in any modality
you’d like, the important part is just to TRACK it!
Keep
things in perspective, Focus on the Big Picture. Look at how far you have come, not
how far you have left to go. Some call this the horizon effect. It creates
encouragement (“I’ve done twice as much as I did two weeks ago!”) and builds
determination (“I’ve made it this far; I might as well keep going”). Focus on
the ten pouds you did lose, the closet you managed to clean; the thousand
dollar debt you’ve deleted; the evening you carved out for yourself. Don’t
forget to ask yourself how much you’ve accomplished the task so far, so you can
mine you success for ideas on how to keep going.
Take it
one choice, one day at a time. When we think about changing something
in ourselves, it can feel overwhelming. But in truth, our entire lives are
constructed of the minute-by-minute choices we’re making, many of which we are
not even aware of. “An unconscious choice is a reaction…. A conscious
choice is a response.” Bring your own choices into your consciousness. If
you’re having trouble sticking to your resolution for a day, try this practice:
when you’re doing the bad old habit, stop and say, “I’m
choosing to…” (eat this brownie, not work out, stay in the office to
finish this project, blow up at my husband, look at my Facebook rather
than clean my apartment, etc.). Do you like yourself when you make this
choice? You can choose differently, moment to moment. The next day, make the
positive choice visible to yourself: I’m choosing to eat a healthy breakfast;
I’m choosing to leave the office on time; I’m choosing to work out; I’m
choosing to work on this project now vs. the night before the deadline; I’m
choosing to take a few deep breaths before speaking. The more you focus on the
positive choice you CAN make this very day, without worrying about forever, the
more you will live yourself into the new desired habit.
Find
Someone Who’s Doing what you want to be doing and copy! When it comes to changing human
behavior, there’s nothing that beats a good old fashioned role models. Babies
learn by intimidation, why shouldn’t adults? Who do you know that is good at
what you want to learn? What do they do that you don’t? The more intentionally
you watch those who are living with the habit that you desire, the more
examples you have to draw on when you are by yourself. Watch and learn –
and don’t be afraid to ask questions. “How do you get your work done and still
have time for your family?”, “Teach me your dating secrets.”, “What makes you
so good at taking risks?” Most people love to teach when given the opportunity.
Walk
the Talk – Teach it to Someone Else. A great way to really cement a new habit
is to become a mentor to someone else. Teaching can help reinforce the positive
impact of the habit you are committed to keeping in your life. One crucial tip
for making this as effective as possible – whatever you suggest to someone
else, practice it yourself. In other words, be sure to take your own advice on
the topic. Its a way to really walk the walk!
Treat
yourself with Kindness and Compassion. Stop beating yourself up. You are a work
in progress. You get
there a little bit at a time, not all at once. Keep doing the best you can. We all mess up or forget. When we do,
our task is to hold ourselves in love. You and I are human beings dealing with
the challenges of growth. When we treat ourselves with kindness, we don’t
collapse into shame or guilt. Instead we are empowered to try again with
greater wisdom from our fall.
“To
exist is to change; to change is to mature; to mature is to go on creating
oneself endlessly”. Yup thats exactly how it works. You set out to do
something new, like learn how to strength train, or volunteer at a group
kitchen, or enjoy life more and something bigger happens along the way. You
become more aware of yourself – how you get in your own way, how you get
unstuck, how you sustain momentum. And because how you do anything is how you
do everything, what you learn applies not only to strength training or
volunteering but to everything in your life. You now know much more about how
you tick, what motivates and discourages you, and what inner qualities you have
available to apply to any situation.
When we set out to keep a New Years
Resolution, change a habit, or bring a dream into being, ultimately we are
involved in a bigger act of conscious self-creation. Rather than being stuck
with the way we are now, we can actually choose the habits of the mind and the
qualities of the soul we wish to be. We can consciously choose the behaviors
and skills we wish to learn, the life we wish to have, and follow through to a
successful conclusion. Not perfectly, not always – because we all come with a
lot of baggage and life isn’t always kind of fair – but to a much greater
degree than we could before because we’ve had an experience of success to draw
on. In these ways, creating a new habit brings us to precious spiritual gifts:
hope – that our future will be brighter than today through the efforts we make
– and faith: that we can bring into being more of what we desire in ourselves
and in our lives. What more do we need to weave a life of meaning, purpose, and
beauty?
Each of us has the opportunity to change
and grow till our very last breath. Keep going. Keep growing.
Keep creating. Keep being YOU
Caroline
Ref.: http://www.carolinejordanfitness.com/how-to-keep-a-new-years-resolution/
